Attention Earth Females

Attention all Females. I have an important message.

Men are not women. We are not girls nor do we serve in the capacity of girlfriends. We are of a different model and make. We operate on different parameters. We don't even take the same fuel. We are totally and completely different. Do not treat us as you would your girlfriends. We do not enjoy the same things. We are Men. Our biggest flaw is that we are Men.

We are not, to your great female disapointment, all gay. We are different then you. When girls get together, they talk about fashion and other boring non-man activities. When guys get together, they talk about girls, comparing and contrasting. We enjoy killing things, chopping down things and other disgusting manly activities. Or if we are city slickers (and not, like this author, badasses) then we probably enjoy extremely stupid looking cars with many lights and the idea that we are some kind of underground ghetto racing gangster drivers.

When we meet a chick, we are gauging if we'd want to go out with her, not if she'd make a good friend. It is not what we do, we don't befriend girls left and right. Stop being so friendly to all of us men then getting pissed when a guy expresses interest in her and saying that he is a "one-track pig". This is not fair. I am tired of seeing my friends get shot down and hearing stories of these situations. We are not your buddies. Stop treating us as such. When you are being flirty and nice to us, we are thinking we have a chance.

If you respond to this with a "it is Men's fault, we are not changing our ways. We are who we are and they just have to deal with it" then you are an idiot. If you flaunt certain behaviors we will react. Said behavior could range from flirting to glancing our way. Granted we may be standing under a fashion magazine but we'll interpret it as such. Stop acting all surprised and disgusted. This is what we are. Find one you like, let him know and stick with him. Stop making us dance because you can and you enjoy that power. This is called, what we Men have a very technical term for, being a dick.

 

Thank you for your attention,
- Maddog
girl i'm freakish shouldn't say those things.

Comments

[J]

"We are not, to your great female disapointment, all gay."
Um, good?
"When you are being flirty and nice to us, we are thinking we have a chance."
There is a huge difference between 'flirty' and 'nice.' So you're saying no girls can be nice, or at least, if they are, they have to expect all the guys to come chasing after them? Well. I think the civilization level of society will drop drastically now that girls are ceasing nicety.
"We are not your buddies."
Why freakin' not?! Sorry...
"If you respond to this with a "it is Men's fault, we are not changing our ways. We are who we are and they just have to deal with it" then you are an idiot."
I agree. I don't think like that, and I have a problem with people who do. However, I also have a problem with the guys who say, "Oh, it's all the girls' fault. We just can't help ourselves." It's a two-way street.
"Said behavior could range from flirting to glancing our way."
Okay, so I'll add blinders to the list, along with not being nice.
You know, I tend not to like girls either. I have lots of serious issues with them. However, what it has led to is me having at least four very good friends who are all guys, and maybe two who are girls, if that. Yes, there are exceptions, but in general I find no problem with that.

[The Badass]

Ah, the J, ever the literalist and confused girl. It's ok. Everything may be screwed up but I still love ya ;).

- The Badass

[Fellow Male]

*sigh* Such is life. If only women understood the impact that their actions can have. Life could be simpler if only control could be maintained... If only restraint could be excersised. Ok, too many ifs. At any rate, Dude, you've got some points made, and I endorse your post. You have the support of Fellow Males throughout the world.

[Hishgraphics]

"Or if we are city slickers (and not, like this author, badasses) then we probably enjoy extremely stupid looking cars with many lights and the idea that we are some kind of underground ghetto racing gangster drivers."

TEH WIN!!!!